For those following this now-boring saga of a crazy person harassing the less-crazy people next door, you are in luck.

In fall of 2022, Maggie reported our illegal addition to our house to the NYC Department of Buildings. Things to know:

• We didn’t build the addition
• She has one too
• Everyone on the alley has something illegally built
• The Department of Building does not let go
• The guy who assessed the damage on our old car after Maggie keyed it all the way around warned me of exactly this pitfall, and said his mother paid 15k to the City of New York for an illegal bathroom (we have 2 of those!)

So time goes on and we are summoned to a hearing (call-in). I blow the first one and make the second one and the judge is all, get proof you didn’t build it. So I get another neighbor to write a letter about how the house was like that even when she was a kid in the 1980s. She had it notarized.

We have the second hearing and I present the letter and am told it should be an affidavit. There was no way I could have had this neighbor do an affidavit.

But a month after this second hearing, we get a letter saying the charges are DISMISSED. SUCK IT MAGGIE. I won!

She remains laid up in bed, and it’s weird. It’s beyond Miss Havisham and into the crazy ex-wife of Mr. Rochester in the attic. But she’s quiet and that’s mostly what I care about.

In cat news, Venus can fetch and hounds me mercilessly every damn night. Last night I refused to throw her pink fuzzy bird toy constantly and she “punished” me by sleeping with Calvin, and I got great sleep. Ha! I won with the cat too.

Happy February!